A Broken and Contrite Heart

After reading my first essay on God’s holiness, Pepper commented — I can see the mirror concept, it is like being in the desert on a moonless night, surrounded by many cars with their brights on, with no place to hide – his holiness illuminates everything. Then she asked – How does it work in practice?

I think a close reading of scripture that reveals God’s holiness defines both (1) moral structure and (2) personality. This interesting feature of holiness is what causes us to cry out — My Lord and my God, forgive me; yet, the following day we kneel with delighted reverence to admire, adore, and worship the one true living God that inhabits eternity.

In this framework, let us consider the moral structure of God’s holiness. I believe moral structure is defined by the law. But not a version of the law that is meant to crush us with rules. Rather a law that defines life boundaries and clearly identifies the things used by Lucifer to put a wedge between us and God. Additionally, through the Law, the one true living God has given us extraordinary insight into the operations and methods of Lucifer. Each element of the law specifies a tool that Lucifer uses to harm us. For example, the law tells us – do not bear false witness against your neighbor. I suggest we view this as a ‘clue’. Lucifer will set us up with opportunities to bear false witness, if he can get us to take the bait, he will snare us. Cleverly, God has given us advanced warning that this is one of Lucifer’s tricks. God is telling us to stay clear of the snare and avoid trouble.

I think we are wise to pay attention to the insight from the law, for we are informed and apprised in advance of when and how Lucifer hoovers, schemes, and works to pull us away from the one true living God. In all of this we can not loose sight of the concept – less of me and more of Jesus. Jesus gives us the insight and power to avoid the snare.

There is more – Consider the beatitudes – Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted. Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth. Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be satisfied. Blessed are the merciful, for they shall receive mercy. Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God. Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God. Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness’ sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are you when others revile you, persecute you, and utter all kinds of evil against you falsely on my account (Matthew 5:2-12).

The Beatitudes (beautiful blessings) is a profound rendering (application) of the law, presented in unconditional Love, to nudge our thoughts and actions towards his goodness. I think this is a grand view of how to exude holiness in our daily life. The beatitude blessings tell us there is a reward for our yielding to the nudge of God. This is not works-righteousness – this is victorious living. The message from the blessings is humbling and encouraging at the same time.

What then, is God’s holy personality? I believe his personality (holiness) is represented in human terms by the fruit of the Holy Spirit. I am speaking of things such as self-control, meekness, faith, goodness, gentleness, patience, peace, joy, and the most important thing of all – love. God is the gold standard for each of these attributes. He is these things. What a wondrous thing to have this fruit of His Spirit laid upon us like a mantle of his glory. Paul says – hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us (Romans 5:5 paraphrased). A broken and contrite heart will never be rejected by God, our unholiness is wiped clean by Jesus. We take refuge in Jesus. When God looks at us, he sees our redeemer, embedded in us.

I choose Jesus.

Hollywood and the Camp Cook.

Long before Hollywood met Miss Tillie, the camp cook was the main focus of his energy in the afternoons. There was only one thing more important than telling tall tales in the evening to his friends – that most important thing was — a full tummy.

Well, I remember once when Hollywood was working on the Box Elder Ranch and he was out there all by himself with a big old wagon full of barbed wire, fence posts, shovels, and all kinds of things that he needed to repair or install fences. All day long he would roll that big old wagon up close to a fence, then pull out a fence post, dig a hole, and drive a new fence post into the ground. Then he moved that old wagon about 15 feet, pulled the old fence post out of the ground, dug a new hole in the ground, and put another fence post into that new hole. Hollywood continued this process, he would go along the trail, replacing about 20 or 25 fence posts at a time.

He would circle the wagon back around to the beginning point, hook up a single lead of wire, and stretch it from the first post all the way to the last post. After he loosely tacked the wire to each post, he stretched that wire real tight. Then, from there, he would string two more runs of wire on the set of new posts and he would have himself a new segment of fence. Finally, he would go a little bit further down and start all over, put in about 20 or 25 posts and then string the three wires across the posts. Some days, this was all he would do, replacing fence from sunup to sundown.   So, you can imagine he was pretty hungry by the end of the day.

On one of those fence days, he returned to camp after a difficult day of stringing fence in the foothills. The camp cook was not done with dinner like he usually was. Goodness, his tummy was grumbling, grumbling, and grumbling. He worked really hard to keep his mouth shut because he did not want to rile up that cook and make him work even slower than he already was. He began to think on scripture about patience and he was reminded of a song that his mother used to sing. He could hear her voice right now. Here is what she would sing —

I was working on the Box Elder, stringing fence wire like thread.

Spent a long time in Dakota, when drifting was part of the day.

Nothing was too good for the cowboys, least that was what the boss would say.

I think he was an old-time rancher, known for how well he kept his crew fed.

Well, you know, Hollywood knew his boss was a good man and he had hired the best cook in the county. But today it has been a hard day and Hollywood was very, very hungry. So Hollywood was trying hard to be patient, but it was not easy. He could smell the vittles cooking slowly. He could hear the noise they make as they are gradually becoming crispy. The aroma was delectably tasty. But the cook said not yet — we are not ready to eat.

Hollywood was working hard to be patient, but it was not going well. He had to leave the kitchen area. He walked out where the cattle were. They were at peace. Hollywood knew trouble was brewing in his mind. He needed to get control. Goodness, it took a while to tell Lucifer to leave, the negative thoughts from Lucifer were not helping.  Hollywood was not willing to give into his temper, he told Lucifer to get lost – Hollywood was clear in his thoughts as he prayed – I am resisting you Lucifer, God tells me you must flee. Hollywood knew if he got mad, Cookie would move even slower than he already was. So, Hollywood put Lucifer on notice, God was not going to tolerate the noise from Lucifer.

Hollywood stayed patient and he stayed quiet. The time passed, his mind was still. God had pushed Lucifer away, and then you know what happened?

He finally heard what he wanted to hear. Hollywood could hear that clanging iron… He heard that triangle sing out with that beautiful ring, calling all of the cattle hands in to the kitchen to pick up their plate and come get some food so they could eat.

But Hollywood’s struggle was not over, by the time Hollywood got there, the line was pretty long. You know, Hollywood went too far away with his wandering while he was trying to hold his temper. And now, there he was, at the end of the line. Wait, and wait, and more waiting. But Hollywood knew God would leave enough food for him. There was always going to be enough food for every person on the crew because that is the kind of boss that he worked for. So, he just started praying about the good things that God gives you. And gradually, bit by bit, the line moved. Hollywood was able to get his meal and sit down. And once again he heard words from his mother. She sang this beautiful song. It seemed like she had written this song just for today. And here is what she had to say —

Fried potatoes, soft beans, flapjacks; good ole bread made of sour dough,

Maple syrup, Jam, and Jelly all over the place, Mountain Oysters cooked just so.

Hollywood reached for that cup of coffee that Cookie gave him, sat down, sipped on that coffee, and started working on his plate. He looked over and noted Cookie’s face. Cookie was beaming.

Cookie says direct to Hollywood – You know, you were the last guy in line. So, guess what! You are the first one to get seconds. Why don’t you come on up here and fill your plate up a second time because you look really hungry. Besides, I know I was late. I am deeply sorry, my friend. I had to find those potatoes. I had to go all the way back into the city. I did not have any. I needed to get potatoes and that pushed all of the meal preparation back. When I finally got back with the potatoes, I knew that I was going to have a lot of men waiting. Hollywood, I saw your patience. I knew you were hungry, but you were patient and you did not say a word. You just waited. You made my day, Hollywood. You made my day. Thank you.

And once again, Hollywood heard his mother singing in his mind. She sang to him —

It seemed they knew our tummy; they knew how to keep us at work.

Thus, when the going got really tough, not one of us was ever called a shirk.

Hollywood finished that second plate of food and his tummy was full. He drifted off to the bunkhouse to sit with all of his friends and tell tall tales as the sun disappeared over the horizon. He could hear the cattle in the background calling, and later that evening Hollywood went out on watch and started singing to the cattle. He sang his mother’s songs over and over and over again as the evening passed, and the cattle were quiet — at peace. Everything was at peace for Hollywood in the Wyoming foothills of the Wind River Range.

Ephesians 4:2 — Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love

Please note: In 1956 a cowboy poet, Jim Jennings, published a short book about his experience working at ‘dude’ ranches in the west. My Great grandmother, Goldie Livingston, obtained a first edition copy of Jim’s self-published book in the fall of 1956. The poetry in this story is adapted from Jim’s book.

Finding Your Voice

It has been my observation that scripture has more to say about studying and learning than first meets the eye. The classic statement on reading scripture appears in 2 Timothy 2:15; we learn from Paul that we should study scripture and be able to express our thoughts to others who do not understand the truth.

If we invest the time, we will benefit from reading the ancients wisdom.  How does this notion of ‘studying’ emerge in our life? It starts with the occasional emission of pithy observations in our favorite bible study (as we gradually find our voice). We sometimes surprise ourselves with the things that come from our heart. We wonder where they came from. Then God reminds us of the source.

The pithy stuff morphs into decisions about how we are to live our life (scripture gradually seeps into our heart, overrides our earthly thoughts). We could say that acquisition morphs to transformation. Acquiring information leads to a changed (transformed) heart. As a man thinks – a man is. You have heard me say this proverb many times in my essays. Take a minute and review Proverbs 23:7…

All who manage their thoughts and control that noise come out of the mouth will keep his soul from troubles (implied in Psalms 21:23). The righteous man consumes the wisdom of God to satisfy and feed his soul: but the belly of the wicked craves earthly prater (implied in Proverbs 13:25).

Decide to learn. Knowing God’s word helps us to see trouble coming and tiptoe around the landmines of false teachings and philosophies. Knowing God’s word helps us to see goodness when we are staring at it. When a man takes the time to press into the Word, amazing things start to happen. The journey starts when we decide we want to enrich our relationship with God. Success begets success. But, during the growth process it is not uncommon to compare ourselves with others. I suggest you refrain from comparing your learning pace to others.

Learning is an extremely personal process, detailed cookie cutter methods do not usually yield much fruit, we all grow at different paces, with different interests in the variety of topics discussed in scriptures. Proverbs tells us — The heart of the discerning acquires knowledge, for the ears of the wise seek it out (Proverbs 18:15). Decide that now is the time to start. Now is the time to grow. Now is the time to crawl into God’s word.

Identify your initial learning targets.I think it is wise to develop a simple list of things in which you are interested. You probably have a vague idea of things you are interested in, but I suggest you make it more specific; with a list you can monitor your progress. A little success, documented, leads to more success.

Daniel tells us — To these four young men God gave knowledge and understanding of all kinds of literature and learning. And Daniel could understand visions and dreams of all kinds (Daniel 1:17).

In addition to the list, I suggest you declare a clear ‘why’ I want to know the stuff on the list. Having a clear goal defined will help you know when you have achieved the learning objective. Proverbs tell us — Get wisdom, get understanding; do not forget my words or turn from them (Proverbs 4:5).

You might have noted that I did not recommend building a formal, detailed learning plan. While this can be helpful for some efforts, I think in this case the level of effort would not bear much fruit. Planning everything out at the front does not leave much space for spontaneous pursuit of interesting stuff you did not know you wanted to explore. I can say for sure – you are learning goals will shift over time.

I noted in 1 Kings 3:5-10 an interesting exchange between God and Solomon — That night the Lord appeared to Solomon in a dream, and God said, “What do you want? Ask, and I will give it to you!”   Solomon replied, “You showed great and faithful love to your servant my father, David, because he was honest and true and faithful to you. And you have continued to show this great and faithful love to him today by giving him a son to sit on his throne. Now, O Lord my God, you have made me king instead of my father, David, but I am like a little child who does not know his way around. And here I am in the midst of your own chosen people, a nation so great and numerous they cannot be counted! Give me an understanding heart so that I can govern your people well and know the difference between right and wrong. For whom, by himself, is able to govern this great people of yours?” The Lord was pleased that Solomon had asked for wisdom (NIV).

I think it might be helpful to approach learning with Solomons willing heart. The first two objectives of learning are (1) Decide to learn and (2) Focus on your learning targets. There is more. In the next essay I will continue this line of reasoning. If you are interested, find the essay titled – Infusing the Mind.

I choose Jesus.

The Makers Mark

It was my observation while reading Psalms — we quickly learn it is wise to talk to God about the cool stuff he has accomplished, our needs, and our struggles – then we seek insight from Him and His word. This is an intense encounter – This is meditation. Charles Spurgeon (a pastor from about 120 years ago) often said the Holy Spirit loves to illuminate the Son. For Spurgeon, this visual illumination came in the form of a prayer journal. As I recall, he would say our pencil is like a scalpel for our mind. If we take the time to write stuff down as we ruminate on something, God can and does become part of the formula. Write your internal conversation, ponder on the message, compare your thinking to the scripture you are thinking about. When we document things, we slow down our thoughts, we process more carefully, we hear more from the Holy Spirit. Try it — I suspect you will be pleased with the outcome.

Psalms 119:9-16 (paraphrased) says — How can a person stay on the path of purity? By living according to your word. As I seek you with all my heart; do not let me stray from your commands. I have taken the time to hide your word in my heart that I might not sin against you through ignorance. … Lord; teach me your decrees, your truth. Then, with focus, I am able to recount all the truth that comes from your heart. I rejoice in following your statutes and wisdom. … I meditate on your truth and consider your ways. I delight in your wisdom; I will not neglect the truth within your word when making decisions (NIV).

The last sentence in this quote says, ‘I meditate on your truth’. This is the notion I have been talking about. This is a commitment, a focused affirmation that we will start and stick to it. It is a response to the word of God, to the one true living God – we are saying YES. I know this takes effort; I am talking to myself as much as anyone who is reading this essay. But this level of thought should not be only for pastors, theologians, monks, but us, ordinary Christians who are slugging it out in a sea of evil, looking for the right path to follow. I suspect, without this kind of focus, it is difficult to experience a vibrant relationship with the one true living God. Push into this. You will be rewarded.

So, have a seat, read a few passages, think about the message, and press on with your day. Ask yourself, what exactly did I notice, how did it affect me, how will it affect my relationships at work and at home? Joshua wrote — Keep this Book of the Law always on your lips; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful. (Joshua 1:8).

Do not make this complicated, do not be too hard on yourself. God gives you grace; you should be comfortable doing the same. The outcome of this effort is simple – you will grow, become at peace with yourself, your family, and your Job. Goodness, I know scripture is not easy to read. I do not wish to make you feel uncomfortable. I am not saying you need to become a Rhodes Scholar. But I do want to encourage you to dig a little deeper. When God speaks, we should listen. Good stuff will happen.

This notion of meditation, focused prayer, and scripture mining can help you become more stable. I am suggesting you think about stuff you are reading in scripture, ponder on it, poke around the verses, focus on the ideas, the individual words, and parallel passages. Actively ponder on the meaning and how you can employ this new-found data in your life. Seek his wisdom. You will soon see the impact on you.

You will know that you are getting someplace when you are able to say – I have learned something from scripture and I need to make some life changes. The hardest part of failure is getting back up. Successful people know this small but particularly important difference between success and failure. Get back up. Find the right path. Move forward. Give Elohim permission to put his ‘Makers Mark’ on your heart. I choose Jesus.

Live By The Spirit

It has been my observation; after listing the fruit of the Spirit in his letter to the Galatians, Paul reminds the believers that they “have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires” (Galatians 5:24). This is his way of describing our turn from sin to Jesus.

In my house above the kitchen sink is a beautiful Christmas cactus, I have had it for a few years. I have watered it and ensured it gets light. It has graced me with growth, but none of its glorious flowers. Then a few weeks ago, I noticed that a bud had appeared, then the leaves changed color and the bud unfolded into a wondrous blossom. The transition this plant displayed was amazing. I think we are similar, the Spirit waters and gives us plenty of Light. This takes a while, but many of us do blossom into a magnificent flower with the fruit of the Spirit.

Paul says — For if we have been united with him in a death like his, we will certainly also be united with him in a resurrection like his. For we know that our old self was crucified with him so that the body ruled by sin might be done away with, that we should no longer be slaves to sin— because anyone who has died has been set free from sin (Romans 6:5-7).

Being crucified with Jesus is the turning point – the place where we transition from death into life – the place where we start all over – the place where we experience the effect of free will for the first time. This does not mean we will never sin again, but it does mean we can move forward.

Paul says — Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit (Galatians 5:24).

I think, we are given an exceptional gift, a gift to walk forward, surrendered to God. Not so easy to surrender, goodness I know about resistance, being a rebel and all the things that go with not looking at the endgame, just looking at the pieces. Our surrender is an act of the will, our will, empowered by the Holy Spirit. Would we yield to him on our own? Not likely. Without help we just stand there, hoping no one would notice. Saying yes to God is no trivial thing.

I have noted when perusing both Romans 6 and Romans 12, putting God first is the only appropriate response to God. The only sensible response for God. The only logical response to God. If we embrace this response, we find the mercy he extends to us and the grace he created for us. If we continue to resist, well we will soon suffer a divided heart. We will have one foot centered in his will and one foot dragging behind, stuck in the world.

In this state, One could say that we are of two minds, we want God’s sheltering protection but we are not so interested in living within his circle of influence. We are willing to walk away from sin when it is convenient, but we do not walk away from sin when it is not convenient. I can rationalize and make ‘excellent logical reasons’ why my decision is ok, but in the end, God is not impressed, and he waits. He patiently waits. How about you? Do you find yourself rationalizing?

CS Lewis says – If we let God – for we can prevent him if we choose – He will make the feeblest and filthiest of us into a … dazzling, radiant, immortal creature, pulsating all through with such energy and joy and wisdom and love as we cannot now imagine a bright, stainless mirror which reflects aback to God perfectly (though, of course, on a smaller scale) His own boundless power and delight and goodness.

So, what does this mean? This essay is about His amazing power to transform us, the Holy Spirit will lift our heart and carry to completion the journey of transformation for you and for me – The transformation leads to the renewing of our mind. First comes conviction, then conversion and filling. Then comes transformation. The final step is the renewing of the mind. This ‘thing’ works from the inside out. We can collect scripture about proper behavior and feel good, basking in the sunlight. Or we can allow the word to transform our heart and then allow the Holy Spirit to renew the source of our behavior – our mind. Please do not lose sight of Proverbs 23:7 – as a man thinks, a man is.

Hanging with God, at the deepest level, our heart and mind begins to crave God’s grace and mercy, rejecting the old ways that seem so comfortable in the past… What do we do? How do we respond to the craving? As a man thinks, a man is.

I choose Jesus.

Hollywood And The Tree Frogs

When the moon passes by the front window and moon shadows grow long almost laying on the floor, then the birds start to sing, and the sky transforms from twinkly black to a beautiful blue. The clouds began their morning dance as the wind picks up a bit and pushes down the road to the next ranch. Here at the Bent Knee Ranch, Hollywood is first rousing, looking for a sip of coffee and breakfast.

Hollywood says — Ahh…  breakfast; the warm smell of porridge, apples, and raisins in a bowl. Ahhhh… So yummy.

Miss Tillie knows what Hollywood likes and sets out to create a grand morning breakfast. The creative work she does in the kitchen is her offering of service to the one true living God. She says, it is my privilege to be of service to God, to help Hollywood begin his day on the Ranch, and to make this home a small glimpse of heaven. Every task in the house is done to bring glory to God, it is a privilege to serve God in this way. God made us to be creative and to do all things to his Glory – even a thing like cooking and homemaking becomes artwork and ministry as the home she builds is used to serve the community.

Then she asks Hollywood — when do you think the Tree frogs will start singing this year?

Hollywood replies – Soon. Very Soon. The weather is just right. Perhaps before the week is completed. I will let you know what I see when I get out onto the land.

So, Hollywood leaves the house and starts working on his ranch duties. He mends a few fences, checks on the cattle, repairs the barn door, and then rides the range looking for calves that are wandering alone and unprotected. His day is long and he sings to pass the time. He was taught by his grandfather that his work on the land is a ministry to Miss Tillie and the others that come to visit and ask questions about life. But, today he is thinking about Tree Frogs for his Miss Tillie.  He sings a song in his head that his mother taught him many years ago —

Do not look at me with big eyes,

Your glowing look, your sunny sky,

happy days I have come to know,

That tree frog I loved so long ago.

Do not smile for what you do,

It seems my dreams have come true.

We are happy as could be in the blue,

That tree frog smiled so long ago.

He remembers the early days with Miss Tillie. Ranch life was much more uncertain in those days. The thunderstorms often started fires, the wolves were always looking for a free lunch from the herd and the local town was not a nice place to visit.

But times have changed, people grew up and grew wise. Hollywood was part of that change. He did not like to bring attention to himself but he could see the differences in people as he brought peace to the valley of the Bent Knee. He continued singing:

When you speak, I think of trees,

A tree right here in the room with me.

Your voice that calls me so low,

That tree frog lost so long ago.

It is strange how God brings you near,

So many days, so many years.

Now it seems I am moving so slow,

Chasing a tree frog so long ago.

Hollywood smiled. He remembered the songs of his earlier days. Now, his whiskers were a bit gray; he moved a bit slower; he kept a bit closer to the fire in the evening. But his mind was still strong. He loved God, Miss Tillie, the Bent Knee Ranch, the local town, and his cattle. They have lived a grand life. Often people come by in the afternoon to visit and ask questions about their struggles. They know that Hollywood and Miss Tillie have become wise in their old age and they look for his counsel.

But now, it was time for supper, Hollywood found some good things to eat. He chopped and shaped and gently placed his vegetables in the pan to cook them tender through and through. He found a thick steak and placed it on the coals to sear and sizzle until it was a bright pink inside. His coffee cup was empty and he poured Miss Tillie a cup of coffee to have with her meal.

Then Hollywood gave thanks for the meal and quietly watched the sun set on the hills. In the distance he could hear the call of a tree frog, first one, then a second, then a whole choir of singers filling the night with the gentle praise for God’s goodness and mercy as the day ended. Miss Tillie smiled.

Psalm 23:6 — Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life, and I shall dwell in the house of the Lord forever.

Please note: In 1956 a cowboy poet, Jim Jennings, published a short book about his experience working at ‘dude’ ranches in the west. My Great grandmother, Goldie Livingston, obtained a first edition copy of Jim’s self-published book in the fall of 1956. The poetry in this story is adapted from Jim’s book.

Gifts To Do What Needs To Be Done

It was my observation while reading a blog entry posted by Sarah Torbeck (CatholicMom.com), she presented an excellent story about Corrie Ten Boom, a Dutch Christian who was imprisoned by the German Nazi’s at the age of 52. I have adapted a portion of Sarah’s post for this essay.

Corrie Ten Boom wondered if she would be able to suffer without betraying her Lord Jesus. She described a conversation between herself as a child and her earthly father: “Daddy,” she had said one day, “I am afraid that I will never be strong enough to be a martyr for Jesus Christ.”  “Tell me,” Her father wisely responded, “when you take a train trip from Haarlem to Amsterdam, when do I give you the money for the ticket? Three weeks before?”   “No, Daddy, you give me the money for the ticket just before we get on the train.”  “That is right,” he replied, “and so it is with God’s strength. Our wise Father in heaven knows when you are going to need things too. Today you do not need the strength to be a martyr. But as soon as you are called upon for the honor of facing death for Jesus, He will supply the strength you need — just in time.”   “I took great comfort in my father’s advice,” Corrie told her audience. “Later I had to suffer for Jesus in a [Nazi] concentration camp.” This is a good example of the infilling of the Holy Spirit. Is it real? Yes — it is like a nitro injection for a gas operated engine.

Peter said — Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery trial [or crazy trial] when it comes upon you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice insofar as you share Christ’s sufferings, that you may also rejoice and be glad when his glory is revealed. If you are insulted for the name of Christ [it might be an accusation, a false charge, a demand for improper action] you are blessed, because the Spirit of glory and of God rests upon you. (Paraphrased from 1 Pet 4:12-14)

Acts tells us — Ananias departed and entered the house [Ananias was looking for Paul]. And laying his hands on him he said, “Brother Saul, the Lord Jesus who appeared to you on the road by which you came has sent me so that you may regain your sight and be filled with the Holy Spirit. (paraphrased from Acts 9:17)

This infilling came from God, on God’s timetable, not Paul’s timetable. God knew Paul needed the power tools that came with the infilling of the Spirit. He prepared Paul for leadership.

Jesus said — I will ask the Father, and he will give you another advocate to help you and be with you forever—the Spirit of truth. The world cannot accept him because it neither sees him nor knows him. But you know him, for he lives with you [indwelling] and will be in you [infilling] (John 14:16-17).

Acts tells us — brothers, pick out from among you seven men of good repute, full of the Spirit and of wisdom, whom we will appoint to this duty. (Paraphrased from Acts 6:3)

This filling was for people who needed spiritual gifts to serve God’s people so the Apostles could continue their leadership tasks and not be distracted by administration issues. These men were team players.

Jesus said — When the Advocate comes, whom I will send to you from the Father—the Spirit of truth who goes out from the Father—he will testify about me. And you also must testify, for you have been with me from the beginning. (John 15:26-27).

We are filled by the Spirit with truth to speak.

Jesus said — when he, the Spirit of truth, comes, he will guide you into all the truth. He will not speak on his own; he will speak only what he hears, and he will tell you what is yet to come. He will glorify me because it is from me that he will receive what he will make known to you. All that belongs to the Father is mine (John 16:12-15).

We are filled with the Spirit in power and given Gifts to do what needs to be done. He fills us, the Spirit directs us, we move. As we diminish control, the Spirit increases control. The gifts granted by the spirit fulfill his mission, in his time, for his purpose. We should feel extremely blessed to be a part of the event. We need him to minister to others, he does not need us to act.

I choose Jesus.